An elderly man in Durban calls his son in Jo'burg and says, "I hate to ruin your day, Peter, but your mother and I are getting a divorce. Forty-five years of misery is enough!"
"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams.
"We can't stand each other any longer," the old man says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so call your sister and tell her too." He hangs up.
Frantic, Peter calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "I won't let them get divorced!" she shouts. "I'll take care of this."
She calls her father and screams, "You are NOT getting divorced. Peter and I will be there in two days. Until then, don't do a thing. DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay, Honey," he says, "They're coming for Easter and paying for their own flights. Now, what will we do to get them here for Christmas?"